Jonathan Spencer
Let The beauty of what you love be what you do.



August 12, 2005

more on: men and divorce, relationships with your children

divorce men

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Men and

For the first since the of our marriage my children are going away for 10 days, with my ex and her partner to France, and I will miss them.

So here I am at work when my mobile rings, and its my son calling me from Dover in the Queue for the Ferry, telling me “they are going” and at the end of the conversation, he tells me he loves me and passes the phone to his sister who tells me she will miss me and loves me as well.

This kind of is told to me on a regular basis, and very often as men we think of how this hurts .

As a divorced , no doubt you try to do all the right things and think of the children first. You are lucky if you do not argue over them and try to comprimise where you can.

I always think of the caucasian chalk circle of the two mothers laying claim to a and asked by the emporer to pull the from the circle of as the real will have the strength to pull the child out of the circle and away from the other woman… In fact the emperor gives the child to the woman who lets go not wanting to hurt the child as only the real puts her childs wellbeing ahead of her own.

Perhaps as divorced Fathers we do not do enough of that. It is too easy when you are on your own, to feel sorry for , to feel resentful to an ex partner, and to weigh your loss.  

can .

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About the Author

jonathan spencer
jonathan spencer
Jonathan is in his 50s, and is as simple or complex as the next person. He has owned and managed healthcare business, worked in the theatre, healthcare, for charities, trade unions and in the commercial sector. His background in psychology and therapy compliments his expertise in business and technology. He is passionate about disability and support for people with disability, in part because of experience in his own family. He has always followed a spiritual path finding a home amongst the spiritual and social conscience of Quakers and latterly joining the Church of England.