I can barely bring myself to write anything, I don’t really care about watching the telly, there are hundreds of channels and the lack of creativity and imagination is a powerful turn off, the problem is now I can’t be bothered to watch it if there was something really good i wouldn’t see it. Todays fashions look like remakes of the past. I hate iPods and they have turned me off music, which I rarely listen to at home now having been forced to listen to others sounds which i dont like.
I am becoming a miserable git, am i depressed?… most of the time i feel OK. My Job is boring and very easy, it is lacking in challenges yet I don’t really mind it and I am given freedom and responsibility and reasonably well paid.
I have watched a few films recently and they all semmed so derivative and lacking in depth or real stimulation. Yet I don’t feel particularly spiritual or religious, in fact i am tired of the lack of congruence in religion, we trust God but find it very hard to trust each other.
I am divorced I, my ten year old son told me I see him and his sister on average 1.5 days a week, yes I am still their dad, but my ex’s new partner is in loco parentis and he is in effect, for good or ill, their father figure.
I find myself playing FIFA06 for hours on playstation, and wondering where the time went but at least I don’t have to think or feel.
On the other hand i have an amazing new partner, who is kind, generous, intelligent caring, lovely, sexy and a good friend, I am moving to a lovely new house with her…so whats my problem besides being emotionally self indulgent.
I dont know
I have loads of half finished articles for here in my head and typed out but I just can’t find the right energy, this bloody midlife crisis, I have been in it since i was 26.

Related posts:

Related posts:

1. Other peoples opinion – of You!
2. Critical Flaws or Projection
3. A Way of Viewing The Psyche
4. The Need to be Positive
5. Consideration, awareness and waking up

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  Jonathan Spencer : Posted a new post on their blog
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