A friend of mine commented to me that after he split with his wife, some people just didn’t know how to deal with him, what to say, because to them before that time he had always been one of a pair X and Y, now he was just X they found it difficult to grasp.
So it is also when you move from being single especially if you have been so for a long time, i think I suffered from this when i first went out with the woman I later married, my friends didn’t like it, it changed me, I wasn’t the guy they could just drop in on, or just drop acid with.
So it is for women too, when they have been single, they can be the ladette or someone their friends secretly lust after, or are perhaps in love with, readily flirt with or fantasise about A new partner brings changes in group dynamics, and to the possibilities of the above…and I never new any individual or group that liked change.
So now we have to deal with this new person, either an additional new person with strange or differnt ideas to the group norm, we have to try to absorb them, show them our ways, or we see a new individual where before there were two and an important part of a cohesive group…and as an individual we need to decide if they are available, a danger, can be reabsorbed…and so on.
If we are a member of the group or the individual, we sometimes also find it hard…to leave old groups or gain entry to new, or perhasp we don’t want to enter the new….
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- More on Divorce and relationship difficulties
